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The Past No Longer Haunts Me.

from I Only Exist On The Internet by H.W.

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lyrics

I'm delving deeper in my self esteem
Dreaming of a moment when I'm free and thoughts will only speak of clarity
Apparently the people don't get it
Setting stages into corners for my therapy sessions bet
I'm underfunded in a population growing by the seconds
Where making effort isn't best perfected
I wish appearance didn't matter to the millions who don't listen to a word I've written all will be forgiven when I've giving up
Dreams are for the fools who think that someone out there really is considerate
And reading all the lyrics spit
And that's it I'm shifting gears within my goals
pressing fast forward, clicking posts and checking what I'm in for
Songs within a subject mattered less because I've left there long ago
there's nothing left to play the role
My jeans are tight and so the rappers tend to get upset and stare within my crotch space
complain about it to their friends
But in the end I'm comfortable within my skin and just because your insecure doesn't mean I need to give a shit
Or maybe I should educate the few who need a better social cue about what being rude really is
but instead
ill separate myself from them and ride my bike home I hope the show was everything and more
For the people that applauded left a scribble address upon my mailing list I hope you understand
It hurts when you delete me from your life
I guess my songs are less enticing then you saw me at a venue live
Or grew a little bit and realize that wasting time on someone who can't love you wasn't worth the sweat spent
Man I get it
I chased a ton of women with attention and when they left I wrote song for them but never did they listen to a single word and then it all occurred
Live your days like it's for you and never let it get disturbed
Now I'm happier a little better off at least I tell myself that
and try stay away from stray traps
that I set myself my fingers hurt from pushing buttons
trying harder for discussions of bigger importance
Abort ship we got a live one captain
I'm better off alone then ever changing other people's actions
I needed feeling lost financially unstable to appreciate the air I breath the gift that I was given
This is the only thing that gave my solace
penned hope a million times in rhyme form and now the storm is gone
Grateful for appreciative friends who shown me goals are worth the efforts I've invested that I'm better then my credit rating states
I'm complicated boringly such basis makes the pain sip faster down my throat
I feel lost without an anchor I want to change the world
but I'm distracted by the characters within this chapter
What does the world hold where do I go from here
The futures blurry holding railing in the dark till I'm crystal clear
Call me friend call me anything just call me up and we can do lunch
Swap stories of our mistrust
You think you know the lines between the story cause you read my lyrics miss
There's so much within the margin that you missed
Just a pinch
I insist
this
is
the
only
way
I
exist.


(possibly)

credits

from I Only Exist On The Internet, released July 31, 2014
Beat: Dial81 aka Cosmic Handshakes (soundcloud.com/dial81)
Lyrics: H.W.
Mixed: DJ Benny (djbenny.bandcamp.com)

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H.W. Boston

A collection of a person going through their growing pains.

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